Tuesday, 4 October 2016

The Bachelorette Canada Recap: Season 1, Episode 3, AKA Nice Guys and the Ultimate Jerk Centre

Week three of The Bachelorette Canada, and already I feel I know the men and lead better than I did for Jojo's season. Having a smaller group so soon really helps separate the wheat from the chaff (or The Chad, if we're talking Jojo's season).

Pool central

Seems like the only part of the Jamaican resort that they're allowed to film is this one pool where only the suitors can hang. This is where Kyle reads the first date card with a flourish, a pretty solid audition for the hosting job! Hey do they also have to sleep on those lounge chairs?

Date # 1: Who's got all the right moves

The Lucky Dudes: Mike (first impression rose), Drew (cocky bugger), Thomas (international model), Benoit (Quebecois), JP (butler in buff) and Scott (quiet guy). 

The date: Dudes dress in pimp/hip-hop gear and do signature moves in a public square to impress Jasmine. Drew says he's walking the line between "confident and cocky." However, it is clear that he's crossed that line and now resides in the Territory of the Arrogant. His strategy is to tell Jasmine he wants whatever she says she wants. He gets the date rose for admitting he broke off an engagement. After the date, back at Pool Central, Drew decides to get "lit" and sprays the other guys with champagne to celebrate. His parents must be so proud.

Date #2: Let's ride the highs and lows together

The Lucky Dude: Kevin W. (Captain Canada)

Pretty awesome date! Starts off with chicken at the Ultimate Jerk Centre which is also the official the nickname for the Bachelor mansion in LA. True story. Then they do cave exploration and dinner in said cave. Kevin W. opens up about a tragic story, whereby his brother was stabbed after being drafted to the Mets and could no longer play baseball after recovering. Really, this is an awfully sad story. Kevin W. scores points by showing humility (great quality, ahem, Drew) and saying he didn't feel he was good enough to be the only son, if his brother would have died. Being vulnerable is a better way to make a connection than Drew's "I like that too!" strategy. Go go Captain Canada!

Date #3: The school of love is in session

The Lucky Dudes: Mikhel (he has a nipple ring), Kyle (tall cat lover), Andrew (just a regular dude?), Kevin P (works on boats) and David (Dateless Dave, AKA musician who said "top that!" the first night and was never forgiven).

The guys have to create works of art with cute Jamaican kids. Most of the guys are pretty great with the kids. But these are pretty awesome kids so they really don't have to work that hard. Kevin P. gets chosen for extra one-on-one time and tells an odd story about his young niece asking if he's "scared to love." I have a real hard time believing a 4-year old said this unprompted. He also describes having lots of mini adventures in every port. I'm not so sure about this sailor who gets the date rose. 

Rose ceremony

Chris the inventor feels like he's "hanging by a thread" after not getting a date. He tells Jasmine that he started a non-profit for kids which consists of having them hang out and play video games that he created. This story is a bit weird, but ooookaaaaay. Jasmine's body language says, "nope." Kyle calls out Kevin W. on trying to get Jasmine time when he already has a rose. 

Roses go to:

Regular guy Andrew
Mike who made a first impression
Kyle of cats and height
Mikhel who has a nipple ring
Chris who invented a kid club
Thomas the model, did he mention he's international?
David who was dateless until now
Benoit, monsieur Qu├ębec

Already with roses are Drew (Tuesday special at the Ultimate Jerk Centre), Kevin W./Captain Canada, and Kevin P. who fears love in every port. 

Going home:

JP the buffy butler, call 1-800-But-Buff for all your party needs!
Scott, too timid for television

Both were totally sweet when they exited. True Canadian gentlemen! I like most of these dudes, they're not the flashiest but there are many good guys here. 

See you next week, Bachelorettinis! 

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